I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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