I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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