Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
