I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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