well you can't waste a boner
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
