I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize