two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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