Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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