singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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