I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
