one two three fourrrrnication!
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
