Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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