Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
