Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
its liver damage thursday
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
