i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Randomize
