He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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