I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
