why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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