You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
