soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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