You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
