She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
