Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I feel like abortions should bother me more
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
