i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
