I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
