on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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