More tranny stories later!
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
