belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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