This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
