i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
