Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
