i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize