weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
do herpes really smell.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
