he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
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