i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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