My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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