My hand turned me down
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
