I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
