Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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