Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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