I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
So much rum. So many feels.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
