i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
