I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
These tits shall not be calmed
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
