I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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