google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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