What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
