i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
