what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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