is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
