Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
You made out with two different species that night
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
