You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
