I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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